Introspective mood

Just remembered I am on the midnight shift tomorrow night.

It not a big deal that it's new year's eve. I used to party hardy. But going out with a whole posse of friends to drink and dance isn't exactly a great time on NYE. And the straw that broke the camel's back?

Drunken expats stepping on my toes by 9PM. Same drunken expats who ripped the ballon drop by 10PM. No space absolutely anywhere on the dance floor. Huddled in a cramped corner with friends taking turns to protect our belongings whenever one of us needed to pee...... Never again, I swore.

By the way, I used to collect lighters. Beautiful expensive lighters. I finally gave up and stuck to 50 cent ones when I lost 4 in a row at clubs. My last lighter, a Trussadi in gold and black leather with matching ciggie case, I kept at home until it tarnished beyond belief. *wry grin* THAT is what clubbing will do to a girl's attempts on starting a collection. But I digress.....

I shall be working tomorrow night, from 11pm to 7am. The graveyard shift. And it bugs me not one iota.

I shall ring in the new year in the silence of my mind and the joy of my soul. I will give thanks as I sit in the quiet of night and in rememberance of friends who made sure I was all right and sound. Appreciation for parents who were supportive and didn't force me down the way of the typical Singaporean. Gratitude for a decent job in an economy where being 33 is too old and too expensive to be hired.

And most of all, to the MasterChief who chinked my armour in a way NO ONE had done for a decade. And who showed me, albeit unknowingly, that I was possibly human after all.

At any rate, these are the thoughts as the night grows quiet, I grow sleepy, and as I wonder how the hell I'm going to last the night tomorrow.

No new year's resolution. I don't believe in'em and they've never worked for me. I think, however, that 2005 has humbled me in certain ways. Made me simpler. One quite easily judges the world by one's own circle, one's own bubble of existance. I am more aware now.


All in all, a watershed year, possibly. Food for thought.