Ian

Oh boy - I just napped at work. So damned tired. Grateful it's a good colleague instead of a newbie tonight.

But it's so damned weird too.

You see, I don't dream often. And I certainly do NOT dream of previous boyfriends or exs. No dreams. No real rancour. Just... bygones. I'm not too good at keeping in touch, at any rate, so previous men are just that. Previous.

Except this one guy. Ian. British chap who moved to Australia, settled down there, had 2 beautiful children. And when his marriage was starting to get rocky, he found me. In Singapore of all places. *rolls eyes*

Anyways. Ian. Wondeful warped sense of humour, never took anything seriously except when it was the right time. Other times? Heh, I had the small naughty boy who enjoyed his ropeplay. Oh my, we had wonderful chemistry on so many levels

Problem was, I couldn't be too sure of my relationship with him then. I knew he and his wife had problems, but I stayed well clear of any issues. We'd even sit down to dinner and he'd share stories of his kids. But never his wife.

Then his company focused on Hong Kong instead of Singapore and Ian stopped coming to Singapore.

And THEN I met Philip, my ex.

Whats so weird about it all?

About a year into my relationship with Philip, I had a dream about Ian. First time ever. I just thought it was .... you know... a dream? But Ian called from Australia a few days later to tell me his marriage was finally over. He asked how I was. I told him I was settling down. He wished me well but I could hear the disappointment in his voice. He was asking about work, and off days, and I sometimes wonder if he was working up the courage to ask me to visit him. If he thought about pursuing our relationship openly now that he was single again....

Can you imagine how bittersweet that is? I think about Ian sometimes, I wonder how he is and I still remember that afternoon very clearly. Since that day, however, he hasn't contacted me. Which is the decent thing to do if you think someone's about to settle down. Ian always had an exquisite sense of timing, grace and personal space.

Why am I bringing all this up? Because I had a bloody nap at work, a short 40 minute nap. And I dreamt of Ian! Argh! After all this time? Why? lol. I mean, when I met Phil, it was 2004! Good grief!!


I'm pretty psyched. If Ian gets in touch, I'll let you know. lol