Wow, what a year

Well well well.
The new year's come upon us and I, for one, am looking forward to it.

Slowly recovering; turns out I didn't catch the flu bug, but I caught SOMETHING because it infected my sinuses. My GP can't figure it out and was on the verge of sending me to a ENT specialist. I can't describe what I got either *shrugs*

I couldn't breathe through my nose because my sinuses were permanently clogged and swollen, my nostrils felt they were inhaling freezing air all the time and ... haha... don't even talk about getting a good night's sleep. 2 bloody fucking weeks. I am growing old if it takes me that long to start to recover.

OOOOoooo.... and never underestimate how much a person needs to sleep properly. :o Most of us can get away with a night or two of poor sleep but keep that up and you'll eventually ... hhmmm... I do believe it can kill you.

Work ended with all of us doing well, and hopefully 2009 will continue to be good. The night shift team is shaking down to be first rate, work wise. Now we're just concerned because the team leader goes on maternity leave as early as mid/late Feb09. We'll need one more person and hopefully the Powers That Be don't fuck up the manpower planning. Maternity leave is now 3 months and if they pick someone stupid, with no initiative and who is slow, night shift team will make life hell for them. There are no managers around, we are totally independant, and we pretty much solve all the issues on our own.

One girl found out the hard way that she couldn't hack it. Look, there are only 3 of us on duty on any one night. Considering all the things we do, if one person fucks up, the burdens on the other two are heavy. We are ALL supposed to be senior staff so your particular eminence means nothing to us. Shape up or ship out. Bah.

Oh, and I will be going for Bernadette's QT workshop this month. Surprise surprise. lol. It should proove interesting. I knew it worked, she'd helped me before, but I was supposed to go for the longest tim. Jan09 just *felt* right. I rarely go on intuitive feelings, but this one is strong.

Lastly, I wanted to share this beautiful song with you. It, too, feels right to welcome in 2009. Poignantly haunting, it's called Dog and Butterfly by Heart. The Wilson sisters are, as always, worth lstening to.



Here you go... the lyrics :

There I was with the old man
Stranded again so off I'd ran
A young world crashing around me
No possibilities of getting what I need
He looked at me and smiled
Said "No, no, no, no, no child.

See the dog and butterfly. Up in the
Air he like to fly." Dog and butterfly
Below she had to try. She roll back down
To the warm soft ground laughing
She don't know why, she don't know why
Dog and butterfly

Well I stumbled upon your secret place
Safe in the trees you had tears on your face
Wrestling with your desires frozen strangers
Stealing your fires. The message hit my mind
Only words that I could find

See the dog and butterfly
Up in the air he like to fly
Dog and butterfly below she had to try
She roll back down to the warm soft ground
Laughing to the sky, up to the sky
Dog and butterfly

We're getting older the world's getting colder
For the life of me I don't know the reason why
Maybe it's livin' making us give in
Hearts rolling in taken back on the tide
We're balanced together ocean upon the sky

Another night in this strange town
Moonlight holding me light as down
Voice of confusion inside of me
Just begging to go back where I'm free
Feels like I'm through
Then the old man's words are true

See the dog and butterfly
Up in the air he like to fly
Dog and butterfly, below she had to try
She roll back down to the warm soft
Ground with a little tear in her eye
She had to try, she had to try
Dog and butterfly
yeah
Up in the air, he liked to fly
The dog and butterfly, below she had to try
She rolled back down to the warm soft
Ground with a little tear in her eye
She had to try, she had to try
Dog and butterfly

The words are as etheral as the harmonics in the song. And why does it resonate for me? Because I see 2009 as a year of acceptance....

Acceptance that I am getting older, but that's ok. I may not look like I'm 30 now, but you only gain wisdom and patience as the years roll by. That's a lot more important to me that looks.

Acceptance that life can only get better, it's cool now but I always look forward. Looking back on my life, in any case, doesn't give me regrets. lol. I've done a lot and I'm quite happy to go tomorrow if I am called.

Acceptance of the fact that I am strangely complicated when it comes to relationships but it's ok too. When I find the right partner, it will be worth the wait. I will never settle for someone just because society thinks I should've settled down to produce 2.47 children. Or any other inane reason.

Acceptance that things happen for a reason. I always want to know the reason why things happen. Or what gave rise to a particular conclusion. Or why people act the way they do to me. The answers are usually crystal clear in hindsight. lol. So I am trying to learn to accept first. Clarity will eventually follow.

So, no new year's resolations. I never make them. But in a way, I too, strive.

Happy 2009, you lot.
And may you receive all that you need to grow (in whatever direction you desire lol)