Thoughts of a singleton

Conversation with my sister the other day :

The Sister : I had a dream about you the other day.
Me : OOoo... izzit? And what was it about then?
The Sister : I dreamt you were pregnant.
Me : Who? Me! Immaculate conception! It's not like I'm with anyone now. *laughs*
The Sister : Yeessses... but dreams about birth and death are always about beginnings.
Me : Ok. That's cool. But it's not going to happen literally. I have cobwebs.....
The Sister : You need to buy a dildo.
Me : Eh? Dildo? But I think I'm... like... a pinhole right about now.
The Sister : Fiona! Don't be ridiculous! *laughs*
Me : Yes? Well, I don't think my muscles work anymore.
The Sister : ?!?!?!? Buy the dildo!

You know, I have one. Can't be bothered to use it. It's an old thingie, gifted to me by an ex. But it's.... heh, for a toy.... yes, I probably DO need a new one.

Recently I've been a little concerned that I won't treat my next partner with the pre-requisite care, concern and tenderness. This is the longest I've been without a partner and whilst I do miss the intimacy that comes with being part of a couple, I wonder if I'm also going to suck at it. After all, habits get more ingrained as we age. And right about now, I am too used to being alone. *shrugs*

So. You need constant practice to be good at something. And treating your partner well is no exception. And then, of course, there's the sex issue. Will I be like a fumbling idiot in bed after all this time? I need an older man who'll keep me stimulated mentally, above all; and I loath having to teach.

But perhaps I should date younger? For once? So if I DO turn out to be a fumbling idiot in bed, perhaps he won't notice being younger and - so the logic goes - less experienced?

Heh. Who am I kidding? What I'd REALLY like is someone who's been around the block a little and who will understand when I say "it's been a while, be gentle with me."


Can't imagine saying that with a straight face though. lol.